Courage

For the Toll Doth Rings on Death Ears

For the Toll Doth Rings on Death Ears

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For when the bell tolls

It weighs on my soul.

I look to the heavens.

A silent cry for mercy,

only to hear the toll

for yet another soul mourned.

For when the bell tolls

the ropes are bloody stained

I look to the heavens.

The hand on the left,

too distraught to help that on the right

For beneath the surface of the ropes

droplets of disbelief, coupled with

specks of agonizing restrain to hate

pucker in the rope of despair

for those who were senselessly

murdered yet again.

For when the bell tolls

Though our eyes fill with tears by day

And our hearts scream in the night

No one hears

Cause the toll doth rings on death ears.

 

 

These last couple of weeks, I’ve felt pain. Pain like no other. Pain which elevated to so many levels, what could have been meant for my harm, thankfully resulted in it being for my good.

It first started with the family members of those who had passed due to the Coronavirus pandemic. Feelings of empathy and heartfelt prayers emerged from my heart in an effort to comfort others as they grieved for their loved ones.  As time evolved, and the Coronavirus became old news, a more familiar issue came to the forefront, one of who we are unfortunately well aware, called racism. An imparity which can only be described as brutality against Black Americans by those feeling absurdly superior, to them. But in their farce image of superiority and condescending eyes of ignorance, it is believed, their validation is that of a genocidal nature, necessary in their eyes, to save the white race. Corona Virus was no longer the headliner for inhuman suffering. It was now, once again, that of the plight Black Americans find themselves facing every day. As if it were not probable, the world was burdened to witness, yet again, a replication of racism executed at its lowest point. This following the killings of innocent men at the mercy of civilian and government officials who thought themselves superior. As I witnessed Black Americans fighting for their life, tears profusely welled up, nonstop, on and off throughout the day. For it was no longer a pain imagined, but my own pain. A pain so deep, so recklessly evident, I feared for my own people. And as I witnessed Black Americans reactions to the plight of those Black Americans wrongly put to death; and listened to their comments as White Americans offered empathy towards them…, us;  I questioned Black Americans negative, unappreciated  efforts to accept their actions of heartfelt prayers and solidarity. Little did I know, my curiosity would soon be quenched with heart wrenching circumstances only God could make right.  That I would later be faced with similar pain inflicted by someone who felt just as superior to me and equally threatened by me, but due to circumstances, I would be forced to forgive.

At the onset, I felt my people’s pain, but could not understand their stubbornness to accept the select few, White American’s, who showed empathy and stood by our side. As the White Americans were extending their hearts to us, we ridiculed them and demeaned their gestures.  In Israel’s plight, Jeremiah made strong prophecies saying if a man chose his flesh and departed from the Lord’s ways, he would find himself in the desert, unable to see the good (Jeremiah 17: 5-6).  For me, we were judging them because of the color of their skin, just as the ignorant had done so, for so many years with us. I could not be the judge of their actions, no more than I wanted them to judge my status of eligibility to be considered human. How could I see the speck of sawdust in their eye, if I were to allow the current events to produce a plank in my own (Matthew 7:3)? Especially, since I was well aware of my Heavenly Father’s teachings. “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as in Christ God forgave [us]… (Ephesians 4:32)”. For this reason, along with my love for God, I could not allow my Black self to join the bandwagon for racial propaganda against the White community. In my heart, I knew, not all White people were racist. Just as my heart knew truth, I knew God’s view was similar, as he always looks at the intention of the heart in matters of diversity. “Who knows the heart?”, Jeremiah ask, as… “it”, is deceitful. But the Lord searches the heart and test our intentions (Jeremiah 17: 9-10). So, understanding the Lord my God sees all, though White Americans may not fully understand our pain, I trusted Him to rule their sincerity. Because of their efforts, I was certainly not going to condemn them. If anything, I wanted to be grateful and praise God for the occurrence. And also praise Him for giving them the courage to do so. “For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer. (1 Timothy 4: 4-5)”. But because of the reactions of my brothers and sisters, they left me confused and bewildered, hence questioning my own understanding of their pain. But to fully understand the magnitude of their pain, I had to live it, regardless of the severity, or circumstance it would take to actual feel it, at any degree. And so, in my own life, as a parent, when I reached the crossroad of choosing my daughter’s happiness over my own, to save her marriage, I obviously chose hers. And so, it began.

“D” day, I felt it brewing. My daughter and I are extremely close. So, you could imagine the threat I must have been to her husband. I continued to ignore the signs of my son-in-law’s secret disdain for our relationship, respected his space, and loved him in spite of it all, until, as my ex-husband use to say, he showed his true colors. Something I inwardly felt, as well as others did from the very beginning, showed up on my doorstep. So, the day he cited me as a failure in all my relationships. A woman who couldn’t possibly know what it took to sustain a “good” marriage ( taken the word “good “ with a grain of salt), like he knew, because, “he”, was in a relationship previously for 12 years as opposed to my relationships which only lasted 4-5 years, I needed to stay out of his relationship with my daughter…. You know the rhetoric…. Yes! D – day had come. But though there were truths in the circumstances he spoke, I knew it wasn’t the truth that angered me so…Or should I say, hurt me so. For he didn’t know my heart and the true reasons why I found myself divorced, and recently separated from yet another. As my son-in-law numbified my heart, and killed any emotion I had left for him, because of his senseless words in an effort to, as he so put it, “save his marriage,” and knowing the one to blame for that bind he found himself in any way, was him, and him alone, I stepped back, and stepped down. If it were not for the thought of never seeing my daughter and beautiful grandson again, frankly I wouldn’t have cared if I ever saw him again. But because of this I asked God to give me the courage to love this man despite his callousness and apparent lack of sensitivity to anyone but himself. And so, God gradually mended my heart. Mind you, I said mend, because it’s still ripped to pieces as its sits in the cavity of my chest.  For as I said, it wasn’t what he said, but how it was said. My separations were always to allow someone else to endure happiness … To allow others to enjoy their vices…I never wanted to be the one to change someone, or stand in the way of their dreams, however selfish they were.  With my daughter in the past, it was allowing her to grow. If I am guilty of anything, it is understanding love. These people who I loved dearly, for their happiness, I sacrificed my own. It’s what I do. What I’ve always done. And God was always with me every step of the way. Just as he would give me the strength to stay, He would give me strength to leave. And I’m not condoning divorce. Or giving up on relationships. But if their your Isaacs, and there are no rams on the forefront, then you must let them go.  And so, in consulting God, whatever ended in my life was always amicable and mutual.  I think my pain from the incident with my son-in-law was more because I allowed myself to love a person, again, so self-centered, that his regard for me meant nothing, if only to satisfy his own agenda, to whatever degree, even if it was at my expense. Genocide. Mother-in-lawocide…Call it what you may. It was a ploy to be the object, and only object of my daughter’s attention without distraction or interference from anyone. The less he saw of me, the better. So, the pain was real. When I realized the similarities in the two situations… people getting rid of people, or abusing people to satisfy their own insecurities, I cried. Cried for my people, basically because I knew, oh too well, the personality of people like this. It would take an act of God to turn this all around as well as remove the pain.

Even though, my mission in life was always to unselfishly raise my daughter and teach her as I always said, “ to fly, just in case I wasn’t around to assist her”, in my son-in-law’s eyes, regardless of my actions, he refused to see it, in the light I was presenting. A mother continuing to no longer teach but help encourage her daughter to better understand her new role and become an even more amazing woman as a proverbial wife. But this too, I get.  I was already prepared. I knew all too well the scripture of how children were to leave their parents and become one as husband and wife (Matthew 19:5). So much so, that the tears I should have cried the day he ripped my heart out from my chest, and memories of my daughter flashed before my eyes, I’d already cried, one year prior. A demon, which brought sadness and anger all in one setting, only because somehow, I knew this would be the ultimate outcome. I also felt his apprehensions. How the calls to me, by my daughter sickened him. Her constant inclusions of me in their life sickened him. Mom this! Mom that! But I also knew my daughter. I knew our bond. And as a mother, knew at some point I would have to take a step back and let her fly solo as I once did before, several years prior. For though my daughter is amazing, all her fathers and I knew, to become more amazing, this was necessary. The day the reality of the revelation came to pass, God allowed her to be near. I looked up to the heavens, with tears in my eyes, choking on my words, and cried, “Why is it, I always have to let go of my child?” Lord why? But I already knew the answer to my questions. God knew it was what was needed to allow her to grow. Just as I leaned on him the first time, with tears in my eyes, I gave it to God.

I believe in my heart, my curiosity and cry for understanding ordered my path in fulfilling my quest to understand. The adage, “be careful of what you pray for”, is my takeaway. God hears us more than we know. And in doing so, will orchestrate our life to giving us, as I will say again, that “Aha” moment of clarity. So, in using a particular situation in my own life which had peculiarly heightened at the climax of all this racial propaganda, God allowed me to feel the pain. Pain so excruciating, I could not fathom ever seeing this person again without the pain and animosity for them being written all over my face. And if that were not enough, in order to really understand the magnitude of my pain, I seemed to keep using Trump as a simile of the character of the person I suddenly loathed. The one person in the world, who rubbed me so wrong, I cringed at the thought of him. Not that I was any better, but at any rate watched as little news as possible just to avoid hearing his squirrelly little voice.  When the two began to intertwine, I knew this was serious. So serious I was fearful for my Christian walk. I could not imagine ever forgiving this person, let alone looking at him. But I knew there were other people involved who I did love immensely so something had to be done. And I began remembering the magnitude of my God. And so, commenced praying and praising him. And saying over and over again, He was bigger than any pain I could ever endure. And I thanked Him in advance for putting love in my heart for this person. And forgiveness in my heart. And slowly as time progressed, found a way to allow myself to forgive and move on.

I wish there were something…, someone connected to these incredulous events that would allow my people to be forced to override their pain. Something which forces them to choose forgiveness rather than hatred. Then I thought of this powerful video I viewed on YouTube of 3 men in Charlotte voicing their frustration in the midst of protestors standing by. They were three generations and toward the end, the older man turns to the younger guy and says basically, don’t be the guy committing the violence. Find a better way to put a stop to all this madness because “This right here”, ain’t the way… Being amidst protest turned to violent rioting is not how the issues will ever be resolved.  I suppose between our love for God and our children, this can be the force to drive us. We must be an example and not choose to hate or behave ignorantly towards others as difficult as it may seem. If we teach our children to hate, and loot and act like, my grandmothers would say, “ like we ain’t got a pot to piss in” , then we are no better than those who believe ignorantly, or behave callously toward others just to fulfill their own agenda. What would this world be like if everyone felt threatened? Picture that!  It would never end.

There will always be someone who may feel threatened by our existence. It’s just the way of the world. We don’t all hold characteristics which project strength to that degree. As a matter of fact, part of what allowed me to move on was actually realizing this person needed help. If I didn’t know myself as I do, it would sound as though I felt I had a leg up on them.  It being ironic since they were thinking it the other way around. And yes, I know the result of my pain did not end my life, even though, in a manner of speaking, it did change it dramatically. Or that the tragedies which took place recently, and over the years could ever compare. I get it. But pain, regardless of the magnitude…. is pain. It hurts. Whether it’s a loved one whom you trust, or a stranger. Whether they were of your same nationality… or not… doesn’t matter. A stab to the back bleeds no matter who’s holding the knife… The hand who holds the knife is not the problem. Find the root, solve the issue. Right? Recognize the person needs help. And solve the issue… And maybe it is all relative, but I believe whatever it is, we have to remember our foundation. The helm of it all which has always enabled us as people of color to overcome, and that is the foundation of our faith and God. If we give them the power to take our faith… What do we have? Our God is bigger and powerful enough to remove the pain and bring us out in a better position than when we began. That person who hurt me may very well believe they have won, but I know my God. And I know despite my pain I am blessed. I sorely feel, though we are enduring this pain now, this will all turn around for our good. We will be stronger and better and assuredly more blessed than we ever have as a people. As God is my witness…. It is time….

 

 

CWB

 

     

    The known versus the unknown- “I will not be moved”

    The known versus the unknown- “I will not be moved”

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    When we don’t understand, or have control over certain issues in our life, the depravity lends itself to our innermost being and compels us to display some of our not so better qualities. Babies, out of frustration, resort to tantrums. And adults…, well, we do the same, but on a larger scale. Sort of like the, “Tantrums 102 – Heated discussions” class, where we, unabashedly speak our mind. A study in the human capacity to learn the unhealthy lesson of the stealthy art of debate, mastered and unfortunately, second nature to many, when the need arises. The prayer, ” God give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change and the courage to change what I can and the wisdom to know the difference”, would be so useful if we all put it to use.

    One tries so hard to except people for their bad side and good. I know I do, since often times I’m preaching to give people the benefit of the doubt. Though, as God, being my teacher, and me, being imperfect, He always shows me areas in my journey where I can step up and be an even better woman. I find me asking myself, why I am so moved by one person’s actions and not the other. And if the reason I am moved is because of what they have done, or how they have behaved, then why am I unmoved by people who behave in the same manner… My mantra to consider people’s experiences of the past, due to it likely explaining their misbehavior in the present is what saves me from many a frustrating moment. The belief guards my heart and keeps me unfrazzled, and unharmed. In Proverbs 4:23, it says your heart reflects who you are as a person.  So, when the heart of the donor is not so pure, or the situation is so ridiculously malign to the point where I am bewildered, I find, my “frazzled” steps in and my “harm” is not too far behind. For here is where my religion is lost, and I become very frustrated. I would like to say in both situations, I am not scared. But I cannot. To different degrees, it all lingers. And it’s not so much because of the unforgiveness on my part, as it is the thought… The instant replay in my head of the situation. The feeling of the emotion experienced. Or simply, seeing a particular something, or someone which resembles the heartless and unbelievable moment when my world and how I view that someone, or something all change. I understand when people say I can forgive, but not forget. And yes, the devil has his own art of assisting the replay to formulate in our minds, but thankfully when we forgive, it inhibits our actions of belligerency and turns us toward being merciful.

    Of course, later, we find ourselves coming to terms with our feelings, which is great. But what about the in between. What we do with those feelings until we get to that point?  Again, what we cannot control, or understand brings out our not so best qualities. I know of one situation in my life, where at the beginning, because of my lack of understanding, I was belligerent. But later, as I grew to understand the situation, as well as, the person involved, I became more tolerant. So, it is much easier to save face when you know before hand what you are stepping into. It’s manageable, despite the lingering, unresolved uneasiness of the situation. It’s the new stuff… the unknown which ruffles my feathers to no avail. For the known, I can quite myself, but the unknown, like a baby, I’m in tantrum mode and become very opinionated, trying to understand the situation. Making sense of the madness, sought to speak. Like children…, not being able to articulate, or fathom a resolution for our circumstances gives way to chaotic behavior…

    My grandmother instilling in me at an early age, her enormous love for me, and the power of faith, diminished many of my struggles and frustrations where they were not as momentous as they could have been. As she rests in peace, it is my heavenly Father who continues to teach me the importance of impartiality and love. Showing me the err of my ways, I continue to strive to be a better person in all situations. I understand, more so now, what it is to turn the other cheek. To endure pain inflicted upon me by others and not be moved. To continue in battle. As long as I know God has my back, I don’t believe there is anything anyone can say, or do anymore that will move me from my frame of mind of being at peace. When I do encounter situations which I do not understand, I call on the holy spirit to guide me, while all along, constantly reciting Proverbs 91: 1-2, “ he who dwells in the secret place of the most high, shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress; My God in Him I will Trust.”.  I ask forgiveness for any wrong which I may have unknowingly inflicted on others and stay in peace. I’ve not quite unlearned all that I mastered in “Tantrums 102 – Heated discussions”, but day by day that number (if referenced to the degree of intensity of my discussions regarding uncontrollable situations), has greatly diminished and I give God all the glory…

    CWB

      Peaceful Ideologies

      Peaceful Ideologies

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      It is so easy to get caught up in the moment and become angry with someone when they have slighted or served us an injustice. Our emotions are flaring to and fro and the last thing we want to be is agreeable. But, as we all know, this type of energy…, harboring angry thoughts and contemplating vindictive actions, can be damaging to our spirit. If, in the midst of our turmoil, something miraculously propels us back and compels us to take a look at our actions, while simultaneously being dealt a handful of wisdom, we would rethink and alter those actions to save peace. For to avoid or mend the brokenness from adverse circumstances, it would behoove us, as said in Ephesians 4: 2-3, to “be completely humble and gentle; … patient, bearing with one another in love…[m]ak[ing] every [possible] effort… [in] keep[ing] the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” Some would say this would be very easy if the people we dealt with weren’t so unreasonable. Or if the actions which were taken against us were not so horrific. If we could find it in our heart to forgive them.  Or even, when being accountable, if we did not always want to be right and prove our point. But if we trusted our God to help us in all other circumstances, we should trust that if we make every effort to be cordial and not antagonistic towards the other person, He would make the effort to allow us to bear the injustice inflicted upon us, thereby rewarding us with peace beyond understanding.   “[Our]flesh and [our]heart may fail [in doing what is right by God], but God is the strength of [our] heart and [our] portion forever (Psalm 73:26).” “[We]…can do all things in Christ who strengthens [us] (Philippians 4:13).”

      This week God has led me on an amazing journey full of discoveries and Aha moments. Watching YouTube and listening to many prominent speakers, I found the ultimate search for many of us was the search for self-purpose and inner peace. When we realize our inner strength and rise above our self we find peace even though at times our ego, or flesh make it very difficult to do so.  It is not always easy to turn the other cheek. We want to be right, or prove they were wrong, depending on the circumstance. We want to set the record straight.  Correct the person who has wronged us. Basically, convict them and teach them a lesson. But God wants us to turn it over to him. We are not the judge of those who hurt us. As I always say, we do not know how this person came to be the person they were when they wronged us. Only God knows. Therefore, for us to judge someone whose story we do not fully know or understand would be wrong. For all we know their injustice could very well have been the product of an injustice inflicted towards them.  We have all sinned or wronged someone in some capacity at some point in our life. Would any of us be worthy to cast stone at any of our trespassers? I think not. So then, because we are weak in all capacities, our flesh being the major culprit, we go to God and we ask for strength to step away from circumstances which urge us to retaliate against one another. In 1 Peter2:12, it reads “Keep your conduct among the gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God…” So just as we hope for peace in our own lives we must hope that those we come up against will also find the peace which they so obviously lack. And the only way to convey that peaceful way of life is to walk the path Jesus walked and be an example. Be the bigger person. And yes, being the bigger person can be overrated. You may find yourself in the same predicament time and time again. But if the one time you decide your situation is so unfair you cannot bear the injustice, is the one time your opposer is open to receive and account for his actions, and you have failed him, your opposer, you have also failed God.  For in Matthew 25:45 Jesus assures us, “…inasmuch as [we do] not do …. [for] the least of[them], [we do] not do it [for Him].” And this will be our judgement to bear from someone much higher than ourselves.

      Let’s remember peace as a gift as Jesus proclaims in John 14:27. A gift which covers and protects our hearts and mind. That, if thoughts and actions are focused on Him…, our God, rather than our circumstance, He will give to us peace because we trust Him to make it right (Isaiah 26;3). A tranquil moment in time which surpasses understanding and guards our heart and mind despite the circumstances (Philippians 4:7). An aura which implores our inner being to be patient in spirit rather than proud (Ecclesiastes 7:8). Avoiding the notion to prove ourselves right, at the expense of proving others wrong. Let us practice the art of mercy as our Father has practiced upon us so that others will come to know the love of our Father. So they too can be changed to finally know him and then go out into the world to be an example to others who were once like us and did not know.

      CWB

        Something to talk about…

        Something to talk about…

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        “Declare his glory among the nations, His marvelous works among all the people… (Psalms 96:3).”  To have this opportunity…, to declare God’s goodness is a blessing in more ways than one. It first gives us the incentive to be mindful of the goodness he produces in our life. To anticipate His marvelous works.  But moreover, it allows others the blessing of hearing firsthand, how great, and powerful He is … still is, in our life. When we speak of God’s goodness and shout it to the rooftop, we are so elated it can be heard in our voices. Our whole demeanor changes once the thought of God’s goodness crosses our mind. Others, then, are able to see, and feel as well, his blessings manifested in our life. It is exciting…. seeing and hearing the works of God in the lives of others. If they are aware of his goodness and mercy in your life, then they know, just as it worked out for you, it can work out for them as well in their own.

        Patience is a virtue. A character, which if possessed, will allow you to see tomorrow, if God wills it, with dignity. I look back on the times I’ve lost patience with God, or myself really, and wondered, when will I do for myself what is needed. When will I persevere through the tougher times in life. I’m not talking about the times when there was no opposition, like writing a book…. Or looking for a job… These feats take stamina…staying power. Once you start, you continue until you are finished.  No…, I’m talking about those times, within those times, when we felt as though the walls were closing in all around us, and we could not breathe.  When the powers of darkness convinced us, we would not accomplish what we set out to do. Convinced us we would not accomplish what God has willed for in our life. Or when we felt like we took a wrong turn in life, and there’s no way we can get back on course. Or our character has been attacked and we believe all hope is gone…The times we feel like our only option is to jump ship. To give up and take a safer, less opposing path.  “[But, it is these times we] …need to persevere so that when …[we] have done the will of God, …[we] will receive what He has promised (Hebrews 10:36).” We need to allow ourselves time. Time to grow, to learn, to think, and to receive the grace He so lovingly bestows upon us in order to achieve what He has instilled in us to achieve. God discloses to us a plan he has for our life, but if we are not patient, we will never see it come to pass.

        Of course, we could, as I have witnessed countless times, view the same scenic route around the mountain, and never achieve the ultimate promise. But then what would we have to shout about? What fun would that be? I fancy the notion, God shielding me with his favor. I look forward to those times when he works in my life. In fact, It’s like a game. Life is so discouraging at times but knowing this gives me the grace to kick a bad feeling every time. I remind myself, One …. “This too shall pass.” … And Two …., once it’s all said and done, there’s no doubt, I will have something to shout to the roof tops… Something to praise my heavenly Father in doing what he does best in my life. I will have, in all his wondrous glory and marvelous works … something to talk about.

        CWB

          Life’s Surprises – My Prayer to the Newlyweds

          Life’s Surprises – My Prayer to the Newlyweds

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          Every now and then, life takes us by surprise.  We go from one day to the next, simply living our lives as best we can, and the next thing we know, there are challenges. Challenges which require courage, as well as wisdom. Some of us fly, by the seat of our pants. And for some of us, we pray. But, however the approach, we all hope that the decisions we make in our lives are the right ones chosen. When considering all the uncontrollable obstacles in our path, it is no wonder any of us ever accomplish anything.  All the unforeseen setbacks. All the changes in our life which sometimes call for minor, or even major adjustments to our mental state of being, such as when a loved one passes. Or when we feel as though we have failed at an accomplishment in life. These are the times when we, unwillingly, are beckoned to extinguish uncontrollable fires. But there are also times when, by grace, we are appointed the task of watering areas in our life which still thrive and have managed to escape the scorch. And for those areas which are still thriving, we can continue to believe for the unexpected. To hope that we are given the opportunity to inevitably change our life for the better. To address decisions, which are welcoming, after a painstaking worry for the future and its outcome. After clandestinely seeking much-needed reprieve…, it is that something which makes us feel alive again. It gives our life new meaning and purpose.  These wonderous moments which gives us reason to press forward. There are linings of silver in every cloud. Pots of gold at the end of every rainbow. The reward for being diligent and believing that our lives are destined for new beginnings, and great discoveries.  And if, moreover, we also believe we are not alone and there is a higher being, helping us and guiding us along the way, it is effortless. For as he pushes us to grow as caring individuals we behold a promise of purpose for an amazing tomorrow.  “Blessed…[are they] who trust …, [and] whose confidence is in Him (Jeremiah 17:7).” For they are those who truly experience the wonders of life and its amazing surprises.

          Last Sunday, August 12, 2018, I was able to witness one of life’s most amazing surprises. For two beautiful and very special people it was a surprise that was undoubtedly unexpected. I’m sure if they were to look back on their life, growing up together in grade school, they would not have imagined an outcome such as this. Their hearts entwined with such love, this day, even a nine-year-old, witnessing the event, sensed it with amazement. Without much thought, these two knew and committed their hearts to each other for a life time.  Both, driven by a sense of urgency, decisions were made, and lives were changed, for them, as well as for others. But no matter the obstacles, or decisions which took place prior to meeting again and discovering their destiny, they understood and committed their lives to each other. We cannot be afraid of what the future holds.  For fear, as I always say is the one thing which can prevent us from living and achieving our destiny. There is a plan for each and every one of our lives if we are patient and continue to press forward. Strangely though, when we reach the end, the outcome and all we have accomplished appears insanely incredulous.  Nothing anyone would believe, or ever imagine, unless experienced firsthand, or knew of their story transpires. It is a story written by God. He has a way of guiding us, and intricately placing those pieces of our life together in such a way, we know could only be pawned by his hand, and His hand alone.  A sacrifice we know too well. If we are quiet and not forcing our issues or agenda, he will get us where we need to be. If we allow Him, our great Almighty God to take what he has made and continue to complete what he has started, he will complete our lives. Imagine the masterpiece. For he sees all, has His hand in everything and has a history in creating much. He knew what our purpose was even before we were born. How amazing is the day when it all comes together!

           

          For these two, whose lives were not always straightforward, I pray that God continues to watch over them.  May he always remind them how they came to be, and the sacrifices they encountered in order to come together. May their hearts remain entwined and they always remember nothing is impossible and to never give up on themselves, or each other.  This is just the beginning to an already amazing story. May they appreciate every waking moment they have together and believe and hope for a future filled with more of life’s amazing surprises living in, and through Jesus’ Holy name.  May they be blessed always and forever……. Love you both… Mom.

          CWB

            The Power of one

            The Power of one

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            Recently I attended an event where the theme presented was “The Power of one.” We all know and have heard others say, “All it takes is one individual to make a difference in the lives of others” Or when voting, it’s that one vote which determines if we’ve won or lost. Even the delectable entrée or, desert which inevitably leaves our pallets insatiably wanting more. They say, “Just take a bite.”  And when you do, you realize it is the best morsel you’ve ever indulged. One act is all it takes, to change a life and make a difference.

            I’m always imagining. Imagining possibilities. Imagining better days. But more importantly, imaging a closer walk with God. But when I take that imagination and apply it to the possibility of having all God’s children experiencing that same hope, that same desire and eagerness to know God, it excites me beyond belief. To not only experience his presence in their life, but to want that presence, present every waking moment is an amazing feeling. I realize though, wanting to be that, “One”, who makes a difference, or committing oneself to set out to make a difference is much easier said, then done. I always say though, to be an example is just like touching one. You touch them just by how you present yourself. We encounter people every day of our lives, and for some, never realize the impact we might have on others. I was exiting a Wawa station this morning, and a gentleman and his family was exiting in front of me. As I made my way to the door, they all turned back to make sure the door was being held for the next person. I acknowledged them and said with a smile thank you. And just as I was walking out, another woman was coming in and surprisingly, they held the door for her as well. But her response seemed much different from mine. Though I smiled with gratitude and said thank you, her response was “Oh, thank you ever so much!” The way she responded, alone, caught my attention. I thought to myself (comparing her tone to my own), she was either a very gracious person, or the door being held for her, in that moment, meant much more to her then anyone could imagine. Of course, that could be how she always extends her gratitude.  I don’t know. But I thought, what if she were feeling down, and the simple gesture lifted her spirits. It certainly lifted mine. As a matter of fact, her tone lifted mine. That someone could be so appreciative by the simple act of a door being held open for them.

            Yes, it was a beautiful Sunday morning. Not a cloud in the sky, and everyone was in a good mood. But then again, it was Wawa’s. Who wouldn’t be in a good mood, with all the great goodies and selections they have to offer awaiting you once you enter? Going in or coming out, you’re excited. I know I was…And along with good selections, the power of a family made it all the better. One family making a difference, for not one, but two people, in a matter of seconds, just by being courteous. And one women, who for me, made that moment even more special when she responded, warm heartedly, “Oh, thank you ever so much…” Lord thank you for those who touch others in so many ways as they change lives and make a difference. You said let our light shine, so others may see it. To display it for all to see. May we have the courage and the obedience to display our light as we remember your goodness and mercy for us all. Thank you ever so much!!

             

            CWB

              Selfless Acts of love …

              Selfless Acts of love …

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              It is true, God is the only one who is authorized to judge. It is He who orders the steps of others. Sees their hearts. Knows the effort and difficulty taken to do what is right. But it is also he, who orders the steps of others to be the vehicles to assist, in that journey. God will use us to move them, with intercession, in the right direction. But I feel, He will only use us, if He knows in our hearts we will not judge. That we will do it with a kind heart… We should always question our motives. “Is this being judgmental?” Am I doing this because it is something I want to do, or did God assign this to me? In our hearts, we should always express love, kindness, patience, and empathy towards those who are not as fortunate. In this way, we are instrumental even before God prompts us to intercede. Even if we endure adversity through this intercedence, we should love them anyway because we know that is what God would want from us. In 2 Timothy 1:8, Paul explains how we must endure these afflictions, with the power given to us by God, for the sake of the gospel. And in enduring theses afflictions He will not leave us in this moment; He has called upon us to do his works. Yes, intercessions can sometimes cause pain. And pain creates fear due to the power it has over your mind. But praying unceasingly helps immensely. God carries the weight.

              Prayer preoccupies your mind from the hurt your feeling. As it is said in 2 Timothy 1:7, “God has not given us a spirit of fear, and timidity but of power, love, and self – control”. Unselfishly, for others we must be strong, for we are called to make a difference. God places us in their life for a reason. Ever heard that saying, some people are in our life for a season, some for a reason, and others for a lifetime. I wonder if those seasons were mere misunderstandings, or excuses to give up. Were they times in our life when we did not understand selfless love. The process of truly loving someone, unconditionally, as we would want them to love us, despite the pain it caused. We must be mature in our quest, if we want to be effective. Yes, not everyone can be in our life for a lifetime. Not everyone can be saved, but surely, if we make the effort to be God like, we can accomplish more than we could if we had not made the effort at all.

              Confusion can overcome us all. We blame God for our tribulations. We find ourselves not trusting God like we should because of the tribulations. Throughout our walk there is always someone in need of support. The restlessness of their supposed torment is like the thief in the night. Taken hold of their trust in God, without them even realizing it has been stolen. Diminishing their faith, while all along, leading them back to their original nature…, sin. No more sin. In 1 Peter 4:4–14, Peter ironically points out, if we are going through pain and suffering in our journey, then this is good. We are right where God chooses us to be, in the thick of it. The pain only matures us with the understanding, we can be free from sin if we stay strong and do not look back.  If we would place ourselves in the shoes of Jesus, imagining the pain and suffering He underwent, we would gain the courage to endure it. It would have been simple for Him to give in and be driven by the flesh. To have chosen life without suffering. But this was not his choice. He trusted his father, despite what his circumstances predicted. The core of our faith must be to trust and believe in His authority over our life. God, thank you for helping me to put my total trust in you, and not return to my old ways of doubt.

              I do believe, now that I know the spirit which lies in me is real, and powerful; and my faith has increased considerably; I could have done a lot better in my latter years, had I known. Had I been aware of the authority God placed in me, I could have used it, to make better, situations which were entrusted to me. Approaching matters with a greater peace. Swaddling them with understanding. Many people may not understand the spirit, and how God wants Him to move in the lives of others. It’s deep. Just as deep as having the courage to believe in someone, or something which occurred so many years ago. Jesus healing the sick; raising people from the dead. But courage makes us strong, as a parent, as a spouse, as a friend, as a Christian. I now entrust God to lead me, so I can enable others to be encouraged as well. To be mighty in the kingdom, even if it means enduring a little suffering for the cause.

               

              1 Peter 2:21 – 25

              21 God called you to endure suffering because Christ suffered for you. He left you an example so that you could follow in his footsteps. 22 Christ never committed any sin. He never spoke deceitfully.23 Christ never verbally abused those who verbally abused him. When he suffered, he didn’t make any threats but left everything to the one who judges fairly. 24 Christ carried our sins in his body on the cross so that freed from our sins, we could live a life that has God’s approval. His wounds have healed you. 25 You were like lost sheep. Now you have come back to the shepherd and bishop of your lives.

              CWB

                There is only one God….

                There is only one God….

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                The definition of intelligence; the level of one’s mental capacity, to learn, reason, and understand. Society leads us to believe, the intelligence of a human being is essential to their success in life. But should we calculate intelligence by ones I.Q, or by the source to which intelligence is derived. Some of us gather our information from books, others from simple common sense. Whatever the source of knowledge, we are all intelligent in our own right. And though intelligence intends to give us the upper hand, ironically, it can also hinder the simplest of decisions due to the considerable amount of information gathered, or retained in our minds. Our knowledge binds us. Some say who would ever want to return to years of young; we were unable to do anything on our own. But honestly, how easy life would be if someone helped us along the way. If only the lack of intelligence would be appreciated as much as its counterpart. No science, no statistics, no experience to convolute the forefront. Just perception at its purest, and simplest form. When I see government, officials squabbling over health care coverage, it boggles my mind. Yes, there needs to be a plan, and yes, it’s probably not that simple a decision when it incorporates so many lives, but from a simple point of view everyone needs healthcare. And everyone needs it in the same capacity, and for the same reasons. Unlike gun control, where the needs can be either for protection, or for the nature of entertainment of a malice, or trivial sport. With healthcare, there’s one objective, and that is to stay healthy. And considering it is much better to give than receive…, why not let those who can give more, pay more. Or maybe in some way let it be a choice for those who do give more, that they will be rewarded, like our father in heaven rewards us when we give. I may be ignorant to the complexity of it all, but I will not underestimate my source. When I haven’t a clue, I know one source even greater, and counsel, more beneficial than any other, and it is of a spiritual aspect. When we are not bogged down by outside information derived by human intelligence, the outcome is unquestionably better certified than the latter.

                We are all made different. We all have certain characteristics that make us unique. We all have a past, when combined with our characteristics, can either enhance our personalities, or degrade them. When we see others at face value, we may not be aware, the true persona that radiates from within. If masked with the essence of coal, this alone can allow our closest associates, family, or friends, to be left bewildered, and unaware of who we are, truly, on the inside. And again, no one’s perfect. But when strife seems to follow you wherever you go, it is a telltale; something is amiss. Even though we say no one’s perfect, and we wouldn’t want to change the other person, honestly it would befit them, for their whole quality of life could change for the better. If the old way of being who we are just isn’t working, what is there to lose? But then, sometimes, for some of us it is difficult to see the wrong we are doing because we are so stuck on being perfect, we can’t bear to think we could ever be wrong. We want so much to be accepted…, liked by everyone, we inevitably fall in to sin. As it is said in Ephesians 4:17-19, because of their lack of thinking, and hardened hearts they have lost touch with God. Their acceptance at any cost becomes more important than breathing. More important than the people ultimately hurt, because we are conditioned to be unaccountable for our actions. Thereby stubbornly not admitting to our callous actions. 1 Samuel 15:23 warns, “For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry”.

                Yes, we all have a past. I asseverate, constantly, we cannot judge someone by their actions, if we have never walked in their shoes. If we did, we would then understand the person. Circumstances in our life, no one knows. Sometimes, our own comprehension of our past and its effect, as I see it, can be a catch 22. If we cannot take ownership of the circumstances and not so much, admit, but realize, how it has impacted our life, how can we convey our feelings to someone else, if do not even realize we are broken? A secret, not only to those we encounter, but to ourselves as well. Only if revealed, we are able to prompt awareness, allowing to dismiss any misunderstandings, or assumptions made on our character.

                I believe because God, knew there would be times, when looking on the outside, in, we would encounter other’s, and their intentions, and believe the worst of them, God gave His mercy. And it is because of this, we must have mercy on them as well. We must continue to lift them. I, myself am finding this hard to do, and if anyone knew me, could very well call me a hypocrite. But from glory to glory, God is shifting my heart even closer to His merciful kingdom, and it is well with my soul. Particularly, for our commander in chief, I pray his soul will find refuge in some way. I know it can be difficult, if all our life, me make ourselves the center of everything. But to exalt oneself to that high a standard is to play with fire. There is only one God, of which none of us can hold a candle to His light. I pray he humbles himself. We know from Psalm 10:4, pride, leaves no room for God, so I pray all men humble themselves, and take inventory of their consciousness, when related to power. I pray they seek Jesus, and make him the leader of their pack. I pray that they seek counsel with God almighty. I know God is counseling each and every one who has misused their power, or who thinks they can, even for a minute walk on water. For if Peter had difficulty maintaining his faith, what makes them think they would not fail in their own strength. As Exodus 34:14 maintains, God is a jealous God. Worshiping anything other than Him, like money, power, or even ourselves, is not putting God first. Deuteronomy 4:23-25 warns us not to forget the covenant, and not to worship anything, in any form, except for Him, as he instructed us, because it will only anger Him. There is only one.

                1 Peter 5: 1-11

                Advice for Elders and Young Men

                1And now, a word to you who are elders in the churches. I, too, am an elder and a witness to the sufferings of Christ. And I, too, will share in his glory when he is revealed to the whole world. As a fellow elder, I appeal to you: 2Care for the flock that God has entrusted to you. Watch over it willingly, not grudgingly—not for what you will get out of it, but because you are eager to serve God. 3Don’t lord it over (boss people around) the people assigned to your care, but lead them by your own good example. 4And when the Great Shepherd appears, you will receive a crown of never-ending glory and honor.

                5In the same way, you younger men must accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, serve each other in humility, for

                “God opposes the proud

                but favors the humble.”

                6So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. 7Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.

                8Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. 9Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your Christian brothers and sisters all over the world are going through the same kind of suffering you are.

                10In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation. 11All power to him forever! Amen.

                CWB

                   

                  To Tell the Truth

                  To Tell the Truth

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                  When we confront others with the truth, you never know how they will receive it. Just the other day, my daughter thanked me for my honesty towards a situation, in how her approach, when struggling through her teenage years a while back, appeared distasteful. We joke about it (now that she understands), but she struggled with it for quite some time. She didn’t fully understand the severity of it all. We often reminisce of her years growing up as a child; and she shows appreciations towards my parenting skills. This was not the first time she revealed her gratitude regarding this particular subject. And again, I believe because it took much time to comprehend, is the reason she revisits it often. Not to mention, the humor of it all. When she first revealed her gratitude, I, myself was grateful just knowing I’d helped her. In all honestly, at the time, I merely thought my actions were that of a mother looking out for her child. I didn’t want her to continue to think, her mannerisms were ok. I felt like she needed guidance. It kind of threw me off guard this time though, when we reminisced. I imagine, my being in such a different spiritual place, than I had been previously, made me think, or rather question my choice of words. And not that they were harsh, just very explicit, and to the point. This time, though, when she stated her gratitude once again, I was grateful my words didn’t maim her. Words can be so harmful if received out of context, or distributed with the wrong intent. If it were not for her knowing, unequivocally, my intentions and the magnitude of my love for her, she honestly could have taken my words out of context. It was not said in malice, but out of love. I always wanted her to make her own choices in life, but I felt to do this, she needed to understand how her actions might affect her life, as well as those around her.

                  In relationships, we may jeopardize its endurance when we introduce honesty into the playing field. But if we use the word of God as a foundation for our intentional truths, and pray, we must trust that God will do the rest. As written in Psalm 32:8, He will instruct us, and teach us the way we should go in a loving manner. I believe that if we come from a loving heart, God will give us the right words to counsel our brethren. My words allowed my child to become a better person. Sometimes we think criticism is not necessary. But it is. How else then, can we grow. For me, I’m a passionate person. And being the passionate person I am, every now, and then making a point often goes hand and hand with raising my voice an octave, or two. It sometimes appears as if I’m angry. But, because people in my life (who, either loved me enough to tell me the truth, or were just too tired to endure what they considered abuse), helped me to understand that I could make my point without raising my voice, I learned to control my behavior. I embraced the advice, which was given out of love, and was mature enough, not to treat it as a threat (although, honestly when it was first presented to me…, for a second, it was my initial response. I then, stepped outside myself, and took a look around). In Proverbs 19:20 it says, “Listen to advice, and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted wise.”   And though many of us may be fortunate to accept change, for some it may not be as easy. For when administering this advice, we fail to consider their past. Behaviors which have been instilled in them for years, may be very difficult to turn around. People in their lives have enabled their behavior. My parents never saw my enthusiasm when I was younger, mainly due to my wise nature…They were into slapping (or at least making sure the behavior never became a habit), and I, assuredly was not going to appear unwise lest I be slapped for my higher callings. The one time, I did try my mother, I was old enough, or so I felt, where I could afford a slip, or two of the tongue. Though, because of years of training, without effort on her part, I later apologized.

                  So as wives; husbands; mothers; fathers; sisters and brothers; family and friends…, how do we take on this responsibility without jeopardizing our relationships? Or should that even be a concern. You hear so many stories of families and friends who do not speak to each other for years. It is in these misfortunes we realize Gods words when stressing the importance of forgiveness. It is also misfortunate that not all of us are equipped with this knowledge, nor the love of God. Or have even experienced Christianity as the foundation of our life. In saying this, one would think our guidance of truth is only as good as the degree of this pertinent knowledge the person receiving the endearing truth possess. But prayer is powerful. And in these instances, with the power of faith, mountains can be moved. As in James 2: 14-17 makes plain, if we have faith, but choose not to utilize this faith in helping others, then our faith is just as good as dead. We should not fear what our words might do if, one; we are acting out of love, and, or two; we have faith God will give us the appropriate words to act upon. We have a responsibility. Imagine this world if we took fear from our hearts, and stood with God, when we couldn’t stand by ourselves. I commend the women who are stepping up today, who have been taken advantaged in secrecy. It’s hard to take a stand, or admit occurrences in our life when you don’t believe others will side with you. Wrongful actions are wrong. If we know this in our hearts, we should have faith that God will provide a way to prevail. Yes in some instances, it is said to let God be our vindicator, but as I see it now, it depends on the degree of transgression. Someone treating me unfair, I let go and let God. I pray for them. A child going astray, I first pray, and pray some more. And when God gives me the opportune moment to speak (and he will, and you will know when He does, for our children also need that courtesy to be addressed appropriately), I speak. For I know, those prayers prayed, prior to this moment, have filled my spirit to say what is right, and be victorious in what is presented. For those women, they found their opportune moment to speak… And no doubt, with patience, victory was won. I don’t know if they prayed, but I’m sure in God’s eyes it didn’t matter, for it was time.

                  I have seen prayer work alone without the heartfelt words… But if the person feels like they are right, and they are not hearing the conviction of the Holy Spirit then it will take time. Unfortunately, we do not make the lives of others easy, when we overlook their apparent confusion, illness, or misconduct. But one thing is certain, as disciples we cannot, nor should we stand by in silence for the sake of our own honor (Corinthians 3:16). For we are here to honor God, first, and foremost. And with this honor we built a relationship based on faith, and trust. It is with these two confidences, we go forth believing, for good. For as my mother so often recites, Romans 8:28, we know all things work together for good for those who love God, and who are called according to His purpose.

                   

                  CWB

                  Corinthians 3:12-17

                  Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. 14 But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. 15 And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. 17 And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.

                    77- “Just in the nick of time”

                    77- “Just in the nick of time”

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                    In my journey, there have always been signs where God ordered my steps. These signs helped to remind me, I was not travelling alone. They were the reasoning needed, when confused by my circumstances. They were the confidence needed, when I did not believe I could do it on my own. They were the hand on my shoulder, which assured me everything would be ok. Just as Paul received the Holy spirits guidance, and admonitions in his travels through the various cities, so too the Spirit directs us now. And even though, with me, his presence was evident…, at the base of every mountain, paranoia and uncertainty always manages to set in when the tests seem too overwhelming. I’d wonder to myself, “Did I hear Him right?” “Is this really what he wants me to do?”  Great at the beginning, mind you… Gung-ho in every way… But when the fog starts to roll in, and I cannot decipher which way is which, oh my goodness, how my faith begins to plunder… With what little trust I had left, I ‘d find myself praying, “Lord, help me to be obedient, if this is truly what you would have me to do,” especially when it would take long to manifest. I’d say, “Lord, if I have misunderstood, please tell me what is it that you want from me.”

                    We are all human, with human tendencies. So, it is ok to slightly loose it, as they say, because the moment we do, “Loose it”, it’s God’s time to do His happy dance. It’s time for Him to show out! Last week, in my moment of plunder, I turned on TBN (It’s so weird when you hear a word being spoken, and you know it’s for you. You’re like, “Wow!”). It was James MacDonald who gave me the jolt this time. He said something to the effect, to let God do it in His own time. And on time, He was…, sending me a word, right when I needed it. Though I am getting better in my obedience…, listening to the Holy Spirit, not being afraid to step out of the box, this has been the longest of all hauls. It’s always the end of the test that gets to me. Impatience can appear unbecoming in our walk, but nonetheless, God loves us. He shows us through our test, that once acquired we will be stronger, able to weather the storms with a deeper sense of hope (Romans 5:3-4).

                    So, to understand my impatient circumstance, January of this year, (this story starts in 2014, but I’ll start from here, so as not to confuse you) after three years in Florida, my fiancée and I found a church, and began attending on a weekly basis (Yes… three years…That’s another story. And so is the fact I am living with my fiancée, and not currently married). The very first service was… I can’t even describe it, but I never felt such a connection, in the way I did that morning. It was the second, or third service of the year, and the entire church was participating in a ceremonial fasting. The pastor began telling the congregation of how the year before, he had promised himself, he would start on his book (first sign), but was, I believe he said a little disappointed, because he had not had the time to begin (It startled me because I was like, “Me too!”). Then (second sign), he started to speak on being pregnant (in the spiritual sense), and tears, just overwhelmingly started rolling down my face. As it happened, it was not long ago I had declared the very same thing…, “Being pregnant.”  I originally received this after listening to Joel Osteen. Pregnant would mean being filled with an expectancy, or better yet, a knowing that something was about to occur. My expectancy lay dormant for quite some time, because for me it was just a dream, a thought perhaps, but nothing that would ever manifest. But now because of all these validations of recent thoughts and conversations, I could see now, in some way, or another, it possibly becoming a reality. And though this was only a minute piece of the dream, for me, this was confirmation, given to me by the Holy spirit that it was time, as T.D. Jakes says, to “Get ready.”  Then, still not completely there (having a hard head and all, and still taken aback that anything, of what I am experiencing is even happening), he for some reason began to speak on moving (third sign), which at the time was the core of any, and all conversation revisited numerous times for us. We were having reservations concerning our living arrangements, and so, at one point in our many discussions, I stated God wanted us to move. Mind you, this being the second time, I was directed to leave a city (last time in 2014), Like Paul, in Acts 20:22, by the direction of the Holy Spirit, not knowing what was to come, I knew, just as I obeyed then, I was going to obey now even if it meant leaving my love behind. So, at this point you could imagine how fast my head was spinning, when Pastor Lonnie mentioned “move.” I couldn’t see straight, much less walk straight, for I knew it was time, once again. I was so filled with God’s presence, I think I literally slapped myself when I arrived back to our vehicle. Literally!! And he (my fiancée), laughingly, was like what the heck is going on with you?” … He was laughing… I was laughing, and crying at the same time (my usual reaction when I’m afraid or overwhelmed) …  I would say this was the height of my spiritual journey. And then, the whammy! The ultimate sign, “77”. Now I can’t remember all that was said, but he was teaching us the meaning on how this was the year of 7. But regardless of what I cannot remember, what I do remember is God was trying to tell me something.

                    Long short of it, after much deliberation, God sent the final sign…, transfer papers for my fiancée to move to Charlotte, North Carolina. “And there I was driving down the highway turning off highway 23, onto ……, get this!!…Route 77…. It took a quick second before I realized the significance, and the biggest smile showed up on my face. I was like “Wow! “There it was!! Highway 77. And, if that wasn’t enough, little did I know, Irma was not very far behind. Every time I would be asked later, “Where did you move from?” I’d say, in awe, “Florida, and just in the nick of time”.

                    Paul had reservations regarding whether, or not he should share his stories of the Holy Spirit’s assistance in his life (2 Corinthians 12: 1-12). For him though, I believe it had more to do with the way in which the Holy Spirit engaged him. Safe for me to say, I did not transcend into another realm, though the moment certainly had me in a frenzy. I don’t know much of anything accept what God leads me to discover. For me, I feel, if one person can receive an ounce of what has filled me these past years, I would be grateful. I don’t believe we realize, again, the Holy spirit is alive. For myself, earlier in my life, I always have known Him as a friend, a consoler, a warm spirit. But never like this! If God uses me to move the next believer into such a state as this! It’s well with my soul to boast of His presence in my life.

                     

                    CWB

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