God

Something to talk about…

Something to talk about…

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“Declare his glory among the nations, His marvelous works among all the people… (Psalms 96:3).”  To have this opportunity…, to declare God’s goodness is a blessing in more ways than one. It first gives us the incentive to be mindful of the goodness he produces in our life. To anticipate His marvelous works.  But moreover, it allows others the blessing of hearing firsthand, how great, and powerful He is … still is, in our life. When we speak of God’s goodness and shout it to the rooftop, we are so elated it can be heard in our voices. Our whole demeanor changes once the thought of God’s goodness crosses our mind. Others, then, are able to see, and feel as well, his blessings manifested in our life. It is exciting…. seeing and hearing the works of God in the lives of others. If they are aware of his goodness and mercy in your life, then they know, just as it worked out for you, it can work out for them as well in their own.

Patience is a virtue. A character, which if possessed, will allow you to see tomorrow, if God wills it, with dignity. I look back on the times I’ve lost patience with God, or myself really, and wondered, when will I do for myself what is needed. When will I persevere through the tougher times in life. I’m not talking about the times when there was no opposition, like writing a book…. Or looking for a job… These feats take stamina…staying power. Once you start, you continue until you are finished.  No…, I’m talking about those times, within those times, when we felt as though the walls were closing in all around us, and we could not breathe.  When the powers of darkness convinced us, we would not accomplish what we set out to do. Convinced us we would not accomplish what God has willed for in our life. Or when we felt like we took a wrong turn in life, and there’s no way we can get back on course. Or our character has been attacked and we believe all hope is gone…The times we feel like our only option is to jump ship. To give up and take a safer, less opposing path.  “[But, it is these times we] …need to persevere so that when …[we] have done the will of God, …[we] will receive what He has promised (Hebrews 10:36).” We need to allow ourselves time. Time to grow, to learn, to think, and to receive the grace He so lovingly bestows upon us in order to achieve what He has instilled in us to achieve. God discloses to us a plan he has for our life, but if we are not patient, we will never see it come to pass.

Of course, we could, as I have witnessed countless times, view the same scenic route around the mountain, and never achieve the ultimate promise. But then what would we have to shout about? What fun would that be? I fancy the notion, God shielding me with his favor. I look forward to those times when he works in my life. In fact, It’s like a game. Life is so discouraging at times but knowing this gives me the grace to kick a bad feeling every time. I remind myself, One …. “This too shall pass.” … And Two …., once it’s all said and done, there’s no doubt, I will have something to shout to the roof tops… Something to praise my heavenly Father in doing what he does best in my life. I will have, in all his wondrous glory and marvelous works … something to talk about.

CWB

    Life’s Surprises – My Prayer to the Newlyweds

    Life’s Surprises – My Prayer to the Newlyweds

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    Every now and then, life takes us by surprise.  We go from one day to the next, simply living our lives as best we can, and the next thing we know, there are challenges. Challenges which require courage, as well as wisdom. Some of us fly, by the seat of our pants. And for some of us, we pray. But, however the approach, we all hope that the decisions we make in our lives are the right ones chosen. When considering all the uncontrollable obstacles in our path, it is no wonder any of us ever accomplish anything.  All the unforeseen setbacks. All the changes in our life which sometimes call for minor, or even major adjustments to our mental state of being, such as when a loved one passes. Or when we feel as though we have failed at an accomplishment in life. These are the times when we, unwillingly, are beckoned to extinguish uncontrollable fires. But there are also times when, by grace, we are appointed the task of watering areas in our life which still thrive and have managed to escape the scorch. And for those areas which are still thriving, we can continue to believe for the unexpected. To hope that we are given the opportunity to inevitably change our life for the better. To address decisions, which are welcoming, after a painstaking worry for the future and its outcome. After clandestinely seeking much-needed reprieve…, it is that something which makes us feel alive again. It gives our life new meaning and purpose.  These wonderous moments which gives us reason to press forward. There are linings of silver in every cloud. Pots of gold at the end of every rainbow. The reward for being diligent and believing that our lives are destined for new beginnings, and great discoveries.  And if, moreover, we also believe we are not alone and there is a higher being, helping us and guiding us along the way, it is effortless. For as he pushes us to grow as caring individuals we behold a promise of purpose for an amazing tomorrow.  “Blessed…[are they] who trust …, [and] whose confidence is in Him (Jeremiah 17:7).” For they are those who truly experience the wonders of life and its amazing surprises.

    Last Sunday, August 12, 2018, I was able to witness one of life’s most amazing surprises. For two beautiful and very special people it was a surprise that was undoubtedly unexpected. I’m sure if they were to look back on their life, growing up together in grade school, they would not have imagined an outcome such as this. Their hearts entwined with such love, this day, even a nine-year-old, witnessing the event, sensed it with amazement. Without much thought, these two knew and committed their hearts to each other for a life time.  Both, driven by a sense of urgency, decisions were made, and lives were changed, for them, as well as for others. But no matter the obstacles, or decisions which took place prior to meeting again and discovering their destiny, they understood and committed their lives to each other. We cannot be afraid of what the future holds.  For fear, as I always say is the one thing which can prevent us from living and achieving our destiny. There is a plan for each and every one of our lives if we are patient and continue to press forward. Strangely though, when we reach the end, the outcome and all we have accomplished appears insanely incredulous.  Nothing anyone would believe, or ever imagine, unless experienced firsthand, or knew of their story transpires. It is a story written by God. He has a way of guiding us, and intricately placing those pieces of our life together in such a way, we know could only be pawned by his hand, and His hand alone.  A sacrifice we know too well. If we are quiet and not forcing our issues or agenda, he will get us where we need to be. If we allow Him, our great Almighty God to take what he has made and continue to complete what he has started, he will complete our lives. Imagine the masterpiece. For he sees all, has His hand in everything and has a history in creating much. He knew what our purpose was even before we were born. How amazing is the day when it all comes together!

     

    For these two, whose lives were not always straightforward, I pray that God continues to watch over them.  May he always remind them how they came to be, and the sacrifices they encountered in order to come together. May their hearts remain entwined and they always remember nothing is impossible and to never give up on themselves, or each other.  This is just the beginning to an already amazing story. May they appreciate every waking moment they have together and believe and hope for a future filled with more of life’s amazing surprises living in, and through Jesus’ Holy name.  May they be blessed always and forever……. Love you both… Mom.

    CWB

      Thoughts….

      Thoughts….

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      Do you ever wonder the origin of particular thoughts? One week I was having a myriad of crazy thoughts. Thoughts which made no sense and had absolutely nothing to do with the current status of my life. I know, in regard to my writing, God will place thoughts in my mind, of direction, and understanding of certain situations, and sometimes even revelations. The thoughts which were infiltrating my mind, at the time, though, were random and not derived from anything related to my world, or anything buried in my subconscious. But from what I understand, in order for them to develop, they would need to have some relation to something in my mind. So, I found it strange that no matter how far in left field it appeared, or how much I disassociated myself with the thoughts and felt it to be an intrusion, it somehow wormed its way into my conscious.

      Thoughts are formed one of three ways from our senses, our subconscious, and, or from our unconscious databank. I did not consciously focus on these thoughts, so therefore its origin originated outside. The brain, then codes and processes these thoughts which we receive from outside stimuli. If there is something in our subconscious, or unconscious it can relate, or associate itself with, it then continues through the stages of the thought process as it develops into what we are thinking. My guess, from deduction, if there is no association found in our subconscious, or unconscious, it then swirls in our mind and becomes a blip in space.  In which case, we are given the choice of whether or not to retain it or label it as being of no use to us, hence disengaging it, hopefully back from whence it came. But what if the thought we receive has some remote relation to what is already stored in our minds. I mean 24 hours a day we are constantly gathering information, listening to conversations, utilizing social media. We are bound to pick up unwanted information which becomes inadvertently stored in our minds. And if we couple them with these unwanted thoughts, there is no telling the damage these pair can produce if we are not careful.  None of us want past negative experiences which are stored in our mind to hinder or allow us to believe to think negatively regarding situations in our lives. I wouldn’t want the past trauma of being stung by a bee, allow me to be petrified of bees to the extent that it would one day prevent me from walking through the doors of my destiny, just because it presents it self at the door buzzing to and fro. Have you ever rebuked a bee in the name of Jesus? Well I have, and if calling on Jesus at the sight of a bumble bee gives me courage to step over the threshold of my destiny, then I give God all the glory. It works.

      But of course, there are greater hurdles to overcome, or dismiss than the sight of a bee. The thought of fear, in seeing a bumblebee swarm over our head, is not as damaging as the thought of changing our sex, contemplating false accusations, killing someone…, or ourselves for that matter. Just as easily as one can receive the thought of a dancer performing in their minds, and then have the desire to become a dancer, one can receive the thought of death, and decide to kill. Or receive the thought of an addictive substance, or an uncharted reprehensible situation and then have the incredible desire to feed the addiction, satisfy the curiosity, or create the moment. And all the while, we mistakenly think, well this must be my desire, or why would I be thinking it. Not realizing, or considering the garbage we collect each day, being a hazard, which ignites the ill-gotten thoughts, making it a challenge, to say the least, to achieve the plan God has for our lives. Just another one of the devil’s ploys to make us believe we are unworthy, or to lead us down the wrong path.

      I was talking with a colleague of mine one day, and they confided how their child, a beautiful young girl, I’d say around seventeen years of age, suddenly appeared to have romantic interest in another young girl her age.  After speaking with her daughter, and running through the scenario with me, we realized, due to the insistence of her and her husband not wanting the young girl to be around boys, this young lady, when propositioned by another young lady, concluded in her mind, if my parents say having a boyfriend is bad, then surely having a girlfriend must be good. Now, one might think, for seventeen she is very naïve. But remembering back when my own daughter was that age (who, I’d believed at the time was very responsible and mature for her age), there were things I thought she understood, which she actually had not. It baffled me. So never assume your child is fully aware of the surrounding circumstances they may encounter at any given time. What this young lady had stored in her subconscious, coupled with the proposition from her new young lady friend gave her own self the impression girls were acceptable to like, in any capacity, including romantically. Her desire to have friends coupled with never having been kissed, almost lead her down the wrong path. We cannot let outside stimuli convolute our thinking. At some point we must begin to listen to our instinct. In Romans 2;14, it is written even if one has no knowledge of the law, through our instincts we can tap into the nature of God’s ways and know what is good and not good. He is in us all, and through our thoughts, or conscious we are able to discern what is right or wrong. But if we don’t take the time to tap into our inner selves, if we don’t evaluate those thoughts which are fresh off the boat, sort to speak, if we proceed without caution, our lives become exposed to a sea of peril.

      One thing is certain, whether we call it our inner spirit, or the spirit of our heavenly father, if we guard our hearts and minds, and accept only that which is good… As it is written in Philippians 4: 8, thinking on those things which are true, honorable, just in nature, pure, lovely, with a sweetness that melts away all animosity, and worthy of all His praise…These are the thoughts which should enter our minds. And only these alone. Our constant battle with the world, is a fight I will take on, with the help of my heavenly Father to the end. I believe those myriads of thoughts were a lesson to make me pay attention to the garbage I evidently allowed to flood my mind.  What’s one less TV show dropped from my viewing list when speaking in terms of my obedience to my heavenly Father. My peace of mind. It’s a price well worth paying. Psalm 101:3 says, “I will not set before my eyes anything that is worthless.” It is up to us to dismiss those things which sets us out to sea, only to realize  we are unable to find our way back. In Philippians, Paul looks back on all that has been done to him and relishes the fact it all being for the Glory of Gods kingdom. In Philippians  2:2 he says, if you have any encouragement in Christ, if any comfort from His love, if any fellowship with the spirit, if any affection and compassion, then make my joy complete by being of one mind, having the same love, being united in spirit and purpose.…Let’s not conform to what is suggested in this massive world of confusion. Let’s be liked minded, as our Father in Heaven. So much more peaceful than the alternative, wouldn’t you say?

       

      CWB

       

         

        Daughters of Zion

        Daughters of Zion

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        This was a difficult piece to write. I was struggling with my womanhood, and for some reason God directed my attention to the Book of Isaiah. In the past, I’ve had accusations thrown my way and always found me placing blame on myself. I mean if the shoe fits…., right…? If I always found myself in the midst of these accusations, there must be some truth to what was being said. But many times, I questioned, if I were someone else…, would these same accusations ever exist. As you know I am an advocate for those who not only have been mistreated, but who feel their lot in life is pointless, due to their own shortcoming, or unfortunate involvement in a situation which was beyond their control. Or perhaps, simply due to how they perceive themselves in the eyes of society. When I came across a particular passage in the Book of Isaiah, it enraged me. It was Isaiah 3: 16 – 26.

         

        16The LORD says, “Beautiful Ziona is haughty:

        craning her elegant neck,

        flirting with her eyes,

        walking with dainty steps,

        tinkling her ankle bracelets.

        17So the Lord will send scabs on her head;

        the LORD will make beautiful Zion bald.”

        18On that day of judgment

        the Lord will strip away everything that makes her beautiful:

        ornaments, headbands, crescent necklaces,

        19earrings, bracelets, and veils;

        20scarves, ankle bracelets, sashes,

        perfumes, and charms;

        21rings, jewels,

        22party clothes, gowns, capes, and purses;

        23mirrors, fine linen garments,

        head ornaments, and shawls.

        24Instead of smelling of sweet perfume, she will stink.

        She will wear a rope for a sash,

        and her elegant hair will fall out.

        She will wear rough burlap instead of rich robes.

        Shame will replace her beauty.b

        25The men of the city will be killed with the sword,

        and her warriors will die in battle.

        26The gates of Zion will weep and mourn.

        The city will be like a ravaged woman,

        huddled on the ground.

         

        Many versions label this passage “Judgement on the women of Jerusalem.” As you can imagine my first impression depicted it being an attack on women in general. I thought, in reading this passage it doesn’t sound like God cares for the likes of women very much. I wouldn’t wish my worst enemy baldness, especially if she were a woman, for as we all know this is her crown of glory. Why would God curse women in such a way as to take away her beauty? Or, to take away that which gives her the feeling of beauty, as would the sweet smell of perfume, accentuating her body, or pieces of jewelry adorning her ears. Are we not supposed to wear jewelry, and perfume? Comb our hair in a way that is becoming to us. My thoughts were all over the place, and nothing sat well with my spirit. But there are times God will give you an insight and you believe he wants you to go one way, but when you consult him further, as to which direction you should take, he directs you down a whole other path, you had no idea even existed.

        So, in my journey, God showed me the message in the passage was twofold. In one aspect it was a depiction of those women in Jerusalem who adorned themselves in fine clothing, and exotic perfume, jewelry, and lofty styles of coiffure with the purpose to weaken the strength of a man. He then used this as a metaphor to describe the downfall of Jerusalem, that because of their arrogance and disobedience and love of other gods, He’d have nothing to do with them.  God was trying to say, that which I made to be beautiful, you have defiled and made undesirable, using the beauty which I have given you for something other than what it was intended. Just as God did not give woman to man to weaken them, he did not give the chosen a land flowing with milk and honey to be defiled. Women were here to love and support their men, build them up so that they could be the warriors God created them to be.  The chosen were set free not to live any kind of way and forget the laws of God. They were not set free to defile the land, themselves, and or God. Or to walk haughtily around as if they were all that mattered, with no regard to the law, but every regard to their flesh.   God envisioned his people as beauty. As beautiful as the women he created. But what they did with this beauty was relentless, and unpleasing to Him.  Because of their disobedience he cursed them. He felt you reap what you sow. You take away their strength, I take away your beauty. You misuse the freedom, I take away the land, and leave you with nothing. He knew of no other way to remind them He was God, and they were the chosen who should live their lives accordingly.

        As for my take and how this relates to my own life, I don’t believe God dislikes me. My intentions, when I dress are not to entice men, or to make them weak. I dress according to how I feel. The colors I wear, the scent I choose; I believe all women tend to do what makes them feel beautiful. No doubt the passage scared me due to the trouble I’ve had with my own hair. Was God telling me he disapproved of me in some way? All the accusations…, was this how I was seen in the eyes of everyone who knew me? Because I wore the perfume…, the makeup…, always making an attempt to appear presentable, even if it were just to go to the neighborhood corner store. Was the habit of not stepping foot out of my house unadorned, or unpresentable, my demise? Was my pride in myself my demise? No… it is not a curse placed on me, or any nationality, or person who has had trouble in the past growing their hair (as presumed by many comments placed throughout the internet). God knows our heart. Yes, in the old testament plagues were a sign of punishment, but not all tribulations are for punishment. Sometimes they are exercises to make us stronger. If we know in our hearts our intentions are good, well then, so does God. We can’t let what people think of us, break us. My God given instincts, that allow me to feel the sorrow of others can sometimes be a curse instead of a blessing, especially when relevant to members of the opposite sex.  I realize, my open, compassionate, and understanding heart can get me into trouble.  Another one of my crosses which I must bear, and which will compel me to guard my heart when necessary. But, for once I am at peace with the hand I have been dealt. I am who God created me to be. I don’t want to be someone’s patsy anymore because someone can’t bear to fess up to the truth which lies within themselves. But from past experience it seems to be my lot, so if I must be the sacrificial lamb, then who am I to argue…

        CWB

          A Better you – Sustained and eventually Reinvented (Part 1)

          A Better you – Sustained and eventually Reinvented (Part 1)

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          The most interesting compliment someone ever said to me was how good I was at reinventing myself. This person, as my mentor, worked very closely with me as I began accepting more challenging roles in my career. Unfortunately, at the same time, I was also having additional challenges on a more personal level, both physically and mentally. Be it as they were challenges, they felt unlike any other challenge; almost as if they were determined to destroy me. And although my mentor was not aware of the facts, but able to see my outward appearance, I imagine he realized, whatever I was going through, I was handling it with great stride and coming out of it, as it seemed, better than when I had begun. Since then, his words have stuck with me as I had a great deal of respect for him. Little did he know that it wasn’t me reinventing me, but God. Because while encountering all these challenges which I felt were more than enough for me to handle, I was praying, God please help me get through this, or better yet, show me how. And God was there for me, through every challenging experience.  With prayer I believed anything I encountered would be made sustainable with the power of prayer and perseverance. I believed I would shine yet again as this too passed. I persevered and became stronger.

          Today, as I look back and remember all what I have been through…, on a personal level. Not so much in regard to relationships, though He had a hand in them as well, as He watched over the decisions I made, or the difficulties I encountered when relating with others. But personally…, me developing as a woman, and as his child. As his faithful, obedient, and confident child. I rediscover, today, my reinventions in myself and think, as so many of us do, where would I be if it were not for his grace that carried me through those difficult times.  The times when the demons were running through my mind trying to scare the bugeebees out of me. The times when I felt everyone was against me. The times when I felt so unattractive because my hair was falling out due to my physical health challenges; through the tears I’d call on God to ask Him to help me comb my hair. Yes, comb my hair! To sustain me for that day so I could look presentable long enough to go to work and hurry back home to my sanctuary. No one truly knew my pains and sufferings… But if it were not for God and He continually instilling the love of self in me, letting me know I would get through with his grace, it could have been me taking my life as I have heard so many others do when they were at their wits end.

          God is our refuge and our strength always ready to help in times of trouble [Psalm 46:1]. God is with us every step of the way. My heart goes out to those who are unaware of the effect He can have on their life. I called on Him for my hair! Which is so remarkable to me still, as I look back. I mean He literally gave me ideas of what I needed to do to restore my womanly glory. For many would think it vain, but for my God, He saw that however trivial to some, I was in need of help from Him. And He came simply because I called with mustard seed in tow. For Him, it was the compassion of a parent seeing their child in distress, if not but a simple booboo as we would say, for that child it was devastating. For me, I understand the brutality of going through situations where you could not even imagine it changing. We feel for that moment, our yesterdays are gone, as well as our hope, and we are left with the feeling of nothing… But if we remember to hope in the Lord, and let the holy spirit be our guide, we are able to persevere through anything. David proclaimed he always envisioned the Lord before him, and because of this he was always happy, in good spirits and rejoicing in song (Acts 2:25-26). When you have Jesus always on the forefront, and He sees this He will never cease to amaze you with his wonderful works. It’s like following behind your father as a young child and watching him do amazing feats that you know you could never do in your own strength because you are so small compared to him. And your father so excited that he can show you things. Proud to be the center of your attention, impatiently showing you all he can as he watches you with love, take it all in as you grow in to the amazing person He is well aware you are able to become.  It’s amazing the relationship we can have with our heavenly Father when we let Him in our lives. I am in such awe of his goodness, and constantly saying how awesome He is and has shown Himself to be in my life. The littlest of things He does for me, amazes me, to say the least.

          I recently tested whether, or not it was really Him creating these miracles in my life. My fiancée and I were going through some tough times where he had suddenly stopped telling me he loved me. So, during that time I began to, of course, doubt his love for me. Well long story short, miraculously things began to turn around. The relationship was amended, and to top it off, he also began to say, once again, I love you. But this time much more frequently than I was used to receiving. Like every day, which made me think, “Ok…, did he have a conversation with my Mom, and by her suggestion, began this amazing feat, or was this by the hand of God.”  For a good while I just accepted it. It was wonderful to hear. But then I thought, good Lord, if this is just because someone egged him on, and not from his heart, this can’t be good. And then it began to sound really genuine. And yes, it should always be genuine, but you know, some men would rather not say it at all, much less say it with feeling. You may get a mumble every now and then, but it’s always as if they are participating in some ritual extraction. So, I said God, if this is your doing please give me a sign. And guess what happened, the next morning no I love you. I was like a wimpy kitten. And I don’t even like cats…. But I wondered, where’s my I love you, and then I remembered with amusement the question I asked only the day before. I said Ok, Lord, I won’t complain, but please fix it back to the way it was when he was telling me he loved me every day. And lo and behold, the next morning, like music to my ears, the sweet “I love you” resumed as usual.

          But my greatest lesson in all this is to never give up. I recently went through another episode of what I would call Life’s most devastating moments and was calling on God everyday asking Him to help me. After so many tries or attempts at what I had preoccupied myself with, I was truly about to give up, when a voice egged me on to try one more time. Little did I know that had I given up I would not have known the next attempt would be the reward. We hear others say it all the time, but we never really experience that ‘Aha” moment, until it has happened to us. I understand how one can give up. And the frustration that would impel someone to give up just before the breakthrough. We think it insane from the outside looking in, but it’s not really. Especially when your fighting with the dark, in the dark, trying to stay encouraged. But now I also know the blessing when we have faith and call on Jesus, or simply give it to Him. The overwhelming unbelievable joy you feel when you can breathe a sigh of relief that you made it through. But not only have you made it through, you put up a fight on purpose. Determined… I’ve had situations where I was so busy, God had to have taken the reigns in order for me to have come through the amazing feats I encountered. And He does, at times. Think of car accidents that were prevented. You don’t even know they’re coming. But He watches over us in all circumstances. But the times when you are in the midst. When you see and feel every wrenching attribute which is determined to make your life a miserable hell. That is when the good fight and its passing is a testimony that will last a life time. You were fighting in the midst of all the chaos and came through. Better than you were when you started. Brand new and reinvented with the help of God, Jesus, and the holy spirit all wrapped up in one.

          CWB

            Persevering with Success

            Persevering with Success

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            I wondered recently, what attributes produce success. I look at my life, and though I would consider myself successful, to a certain degree, I’ve yet to accomplish the more challenging goals laid out before me. Or should I say, those goals which God has placed in my heart. There are times when I think I should be doing more but feel as though I procrastinate. After putting in my 9 – 5, the first thing that comes to mind is R & R which unfortunately, at times, leads to a feeling of guilt…. But then, with God’s grace, He encourages me, and reminds me I am operating in His time and this is good. In 2 Peter 3: 8-9 and Habakkuk 2-3, we are asked to be patient, for the visions placed in our heart will come to pass, despite the long wait for it to manifest.

            In general, woman, rarely have moments of pure relaxation…. But, then again, who does these days. I do know, if I am procrastinating, I am the most productive procrastinator I know. I may not be accomplishing my greatest feat, but I have accomplished a great many feats, none the less. There is always something that will need our attention, thereby lending our dream – goal oriented tasks to neglect, and, or a disturbed feeling of procrastination. We set out keeping God first and foremost; keeping a happy home; and keeping ourselves intact in the midst of everything going on in life.  I feel I start things, and rarely are able to finish what I started. Always distracted by other tasks. Passions in life require time, and commitment. Two of the things, I either do not have, or rather not do, for fear I will end up quitting anyway because of what I feel I do not have, which is of course, again is time. . . But this is a new dawn on my life. I feel God has anointed this time in my life and I am compelled to seek His presence, vigilantly, now more than ever. I want to achieve and produce amazing feats because God has done such amazing feats in my life. I guess like any child, you want to acknowledge the sacrifices made on your behalf and show your appreciation for what your parents have done for you.  I realize, if those desires, I want to accomplish are truly anointings from God, my Father, He will guide me to do what He has called me to do.  Whether it be raising my children, taking care of my parents, working in my profession, or realizing my humanitarian passions, God will make a way and guide my path to the destiny He willed for my life.

            Success in anything we will do in life, no doubt requires hard work. Lack of time is not the only deterrent.  You can have the passion all day long, but if there is no motivation, or willingness to muster through the muddy waters, you will likely fail. Take my writing for instance. If it were not for God’s grace, assuredly, I would not be doing this today. I’ve had a passion for writing for a good 20 years, if not more. I’d start and stop. Start and stop. Never sticking to the task of completing a project. But as I started seeking God, earnestly, realizing without him life is so much more difficult, I then realized along the way, I was more successful in everything I did. And that which He placed on my heart became an even deeper desire. More like a need. It became part of me and was no longer a dream. This is when I realized dawn had come. Though I still had very little time to accomplish what I desired or needed to do, I had Him to lean on and guide me throughout my day. You hear others say God wants you to include him in everything you do. Well it’s not just so He, I don’t know, can take up more of your time. It truly benefits you. I get so much more accomplished when I seek him continuously throughout the day.  I say, “Lord you put this before me, and I don’t see how I ‘m going to be able to accomplish everything.” “I need your help.” “Order my steps today.” Simple as that, and He guides me to the areas I need to address first. I finish with the first task, and then ask him what I should do next, and the Holy spirit guides me. Till I suddenly realize, I have accomplished so much, while still managing to get some rest (which is by the way, very important to me). He is so amazing! Now don’t get me wrong, it’s still hard work, but it’s so much more enjoyable, and much more rewarding when you do it in the midst of seeking God. The hour and a half commute to work, which everyone seems to dread, feels like half an hour when I’m praising him, or catching up with family members on the phone. The worry as to whether, or not I will forfeit rest for productivity, no longer a concern. He just orders my steps, prioritizes my schedule, and to my amazement I feel better than ever, accomplishing all that I set out to do, including my passions.

            As it states in Psalms 16:3, if you commit, or seek God regarding the work set before you, it will be successful because you sought him. He would not give us a task, or responsibility, or blessing and not support us in what we do. When He said He will not leave or forsake us, it was meant in every aspect of our life. We are called for a purpose. Whether it is the purpose of raising our children; keeping a pleasant home for our family; building upon in our career the talents God so graciously instilled in us; good will come because it was willed by God and guided by the Holy spirit. We should never feel as though accomplishments are impossible, because as we all know, all things are possible with God. Run your race with enthusiasm. Delight yourself in His amazing mercy and see what He has in store for you….

            CWB

              My Achilles Heel

              My Achilles Heel

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              When I look at the world, and that which influence our lives, I first think of God, then science, and then something of a gray matter, which I will call the spiritual realm. And in this realm, I would say, consist of spirits of darkness, and then our own spiritual existence. With the assistance of the spirits of darkness, negativity flourishes, and at times will take hold of our own spirituality, causing massive confusion. I believe many of us become caught in a web within the spiritual realm of others, which in turn, can lead to some form of destruction, if not careful. Due to this web of destruction, we no longer have control over our own subconscious, and so, it confines us. Makes us insecure. Instills fear and doubt in our minds. Just as much as we need to know God, we also need to know our enemy, and how he works. So, although, my lot in life is a quest for a deeper understanding and spiritual connection with God, it sometimes will include the quest for a deeper understanding of the spirits of darkness, and those influences surrounding us. For ultimately, it is these which hinder us from becoming who God created us to be.

              Influences which inhabit our bodies can be tricky. We want to account for our behavior, but again, sometimes it is not always our choice as to how we react to certain situations. Especially when it involves and effects the contentment of others. There was a time, I would be hesitant in saying that a person’s spirit, or, for lack of a better word, influence, could incorporate our bodies, and proceed to take over our minds. Who of us want to believe that a person can have that much hold over us? It is one thing to be manipulated physically, but when someone can influence your judgement, it not only becomes a matter of control, but violation. Because we are told our decisions are free of our own choice, we do not consider the foreign influences which may stealth inside us. It is a harder fight when you do not know, who, or what you are fighting, than when you are aware of who you are up against. When a person’s spirit, whether near, or far, can manipulate your thinking, life can be a lot more exhausting then we all bargain for. There have been several instances in my life where people confessed their motives, which in turn, eerily coincided with my previous subconscious bout, where I had had a recent sense, or feeling, someone or something regarding the very same circumstance was manipulating my thinking. I found many people who had this effect on me were avid controllers, and manipulators. All very congenial on the outside, but if paid attention, the apparent control issues reserved for timely matters, which inevitably were incomprehensible, would be revealed.

              Years ago, when viewing the news, there seemed to be an array of instances, similar to this, which intrigued me. Nice people… loving moms, straight “A” students, Godly people, taking a turn for the worse, and involving themselves in horrific acts against themselves, and, or their loved ones. I would say to myself, if only I could ask them who in their lives had a stake in what they were doing. Who did they make angry because they were not living, or doing what was expected of them? My father once said to me “Live a good life, but more importantly, try not to piss anyone off.” It stuck with me, and today I see precisely what he meant. And too, a lot of times, like in Matthew 16:23, when Jesus revealed he had to go to Jerusalem to die, and Peter was beside himself, urging him not to go…, there are some who, whether subconsciously, or consciously begin a crusade to protect , what they believe to be a vested interest in someone else’s life. Despite their motive, whether selfish, or out of love, and concern for the other person’s wellbeing, it is manipulative and sinful if they obsess thoughts of redirection, and, or demise for that person. We cannot judge another person’s actions simply because we do not agree with them. As it says in Romans 14: 1-23, our beliefs are no better than our brethren beliefs. And the only person who has the authority to pass judgement is God. We all have ideals we passionately believe in our heart. But, until that person believes otherwise, it is no one’s right to come against them. Peter ‘s direct reaction to Jesus’ revelation alerted Jesus of his confusion, and realized it was of the devil, and so responded, “Get thee behind me satan.”   Peter did not consider the factor of God’s calling. He allowed satan to cloud his judgement, not knowing this was Jesus’ calling to die for our sins. But this, was an obvious attack. If this were capitalized in the spiritual realm, where it would not be so obvious, our only choice would be to try and understand the thoughts in our mind which unknowingly were instilled by other elements. We then would believe, either something was wrong with us, or…, we would make decisions which were not our own., or both… now giving way to confusion, because we not only have God directing our steps, but this other spiritual being directing our steps as well. And yes, the devil can use other people to influence us. But, all in all, if these people are in our circle, and are influenced to do harm against us, but appear to be sheep in the natural, we need to know what we are up against. Though for many of us we can be strong, there are some who contemplate suicide because of this confusion, or who kill their children because of this confusion, so on and so on… We need to know and sympathize with others who appear confused in their dilemma’s, and realize ourselves, the torment some may go through is not necessarily from their own destruction, but the wrath of someone’s selfishness.

              Have you ever not done something someone wanted you to do in regard to your own life, and felt their wrath? I believe these are the last mysteries of life which are strictly taboo. And, I say all this not to put fear in our minds, but to make us aware of those we come in contact. Science has an answer for everything, but sometimes there is no answer, just the relevance of it being what it is in our subconscious, and the truth which is revealed, if pursued persistently to find the answer. Just as it was with Jesus, it is with us today, confusion setting in for some, who then in turn develop this animosity towards others, bringing into our lives unexplainable wrath. The wrath which for me, at one time consumed my body. But now I realize some of the decisions, and actions I took were influenced, more so, by the wrath of others. My Achilles is being receptive to all this due to my sensitivity, and naive compassion for others.  Over the years I’ve gotten stronger, and can now pick up on issues such as this. But I want people to know not to be hard on themselves. They can become strong and become who God created them to be despite those who consistently come against them. Because of God’s spirituality in me, I can see the confusion, others may not. But both influences being somewhat inaudible, has the capability to lead to perhaps thinking God is against me. This, followed by audible wraths of confusion, can be convincing. And because I know I am not alone, these are the people who I want to set free, and let them know, one…., they are not alone, and two…, they can be healed. Science and the definitions why some may hear actual voices, or do the things they do, are not always black and white. Sometimes, like the love of God, and his heavenly existence, we have to incorporate the unknown to survive, even if we do not understand. I could have very well been considered bipolar (and to some, I was), but without a shadow of a doubt, I know now, it wasn’t a, “chemical imbalance” as some labeled, but the influence of someone’s wrath. Whether they were influenced by the devil, and in turn influenced me, neither here nor there…. They subconsciously led me…, vulnerable to the spirit world, and in turn affected my being. But I fight to the death with the help of my God, for I know he loves me and will not leave me, despite how it may seem on the inside.

              Being aware of our Achilles empowers us. As they say, I cannot change those against me, but I can change who I am, and become strong. Guard my heart when something does not feel right. Push forward, even when confusion sets in, and I cannot understand why. Confusion is the key. We will never live the life God intended us to live if we are unaware of our enemies, or those with selfish motives, or more importantly, unaware of our calling… Our Achilles heel could be our sensitivity, and, or obligation to others, and the people we love… It could be addictions; we cannot let go. But if we call on our heavenly father, the only being who is truly looking out for us, we can live a fruitful and prosperous life. I know now when he communicates to me it is soft, like a brush of wind. A flash of revelation. A warm embrace… A happy feeling of knowing. Unexplainable tears, or joys of laughter, all void of confusion. My Achilles will no longer be my demise, but my strength, for when I am weak, then I am strong…. Happy New Year’s!!

              CWB

              Hello… Venturing into new avenues the start of the year. I believe the Lord is allowing me leave of absence, so depending on my schedule, may or may not be back until possibly June. Until then, have a wonderful start to the New year, and remember God Loves you so very much. He is just a whisper away if you seek him wholeheartedly…. May peace be with you wherever you go… CWB

                The August Rush complex

                The August Rush complex

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                My Christmas wish for all is to experience…. The August Rush.

                 

                Spirits in the wind… The voices from heaven…

                 

                If I had the voice of an angel, I would lift my voice high for all heavens to rejoice.

                He that formed me and made me…

                My voice would be my hope. The hope which comes from above. People would be lifted, and all would feel love … if I had the voice of an angel.

                 

                If I had the words to change the heart of man, I would speak for all to hear.

                He that formed me and made me…

                My words would be their salvation. The salvation which comes from above. Hearts would be full, and all would be free…if I had the words to change the heart of man.

                 

                Spirits in the wind. The joy from heaven….

                Oh, how Wonderous it would be to share the joy which fills my every soul.

                God, you are my muse.

                Lift my voice…. Form my words… as I catch the spirits which sway in the wind, so they too can feel the breeze of your joy and your love.

                 

                I listen and feel your joy and your love, just as I see and hear their confusion and their pain.

                As I wear my sob from your warm embrace, I am dizzy from the strength of your gentle hug.

                Oh…., the warmth you bring me.

                The spirit in the wind will give me air to breathe, and strength to carry on. It will shine a path, and direct my steps.

                 

                For Lord, it is you, who sways the wind.

                It is you, who fills my spirit with hope and joy.

                It is you, who loves me to the depths of my soul.

                It is you, who gives me salvation.

                It is you, who filled me with the complex of August rush…

                John 15: 9-17

                9“Just as the Father has loved me, I have also loved you; remain in my love. 10If you obey my commandments, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commandments and remain in his love. 11I have told you these things so that my joy may be in you, and your joy may be complete. 12My commandment is this – to love one another just as I have loved you. 

                IN THE GARDEN
                words & music by
                C Austin Miles

                Verse 1
                I come to the garden alone,
                While the dew is still on the roses;
                And the voice I hear,
                Falling on my ear,
                The Son of God discloses.

                Chorus:
                And he walks with me
                And He talks with me,
                And He tells me I am his own;
                And the joy we share as we tarry there,
                None other has ever known.

                Verse 2
                He speaks and the sound of His voice
                Is so sweet the birds hush their singing;
                And the melody that He gave to me
                Within my heart is ringing.

                Chorus

                Verse 3
                I’d stay in the garden with Him,
                Tho’ the night around me be falling,
                But He bids me go;
                Thro’ the voice of woe
                His voice to me is calling.

                ♥Merry Christmas to All♥

                CWB

                  He heals and restore – Because He loves us… & He is our Father

                  He heals and restore – Because He loves us… & He is our Father

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                  God is an awesome God. I do not know how He does what He does, or why He is doing, what He is doing in my life, but I am grateful. Well…, I guess I do know why. Because He loves me. If taken note, we can see the many times, He has answered our prayers. He loves the humor in it all. It brings Him joy to see our faces, when we realize just how much He loves us. When we let go, and rest in Him, knowing He has it all under control. When we realize we are special, and important to Him. When we put all our cares, and trust in Him, He then touches every area of our lives. He will be our healer not only to our physical being, but to our mental being. And with that, it enables Him to restore our relationships, as well as any unwanted inconceivable situation we find ourselves. He is a restorer to all aspects of our life… big, and small.

                  In our life, unwanted circumstances, when governed by our flesh incite disconcertment. We lose it…  All bearings, beliefs, and pottered being…, gone. Suddenly our lives are uncontrollable, spiraling into the walls of despair, with no opportunity to turn left, or right. God has formed you into this incredible being, and then inconvenient circumstances take it all away. We could try to change the circumstances, but what good would it do. Whether the fight be with man, or darkness, we should, instead, turn to God in prayer. In Psalm 37:4, we are told if we ponder on the word of God, and sanctify ourselves with the renowned goodness of God, He will then give us the desires of our heart. This holds true not only to our well-being, but the well-being of others. We should pray for those we encounter when their situations seem chaotic, or inconceivable. In Hebrew 4:16, it says let us approach God with confidence, so that we will receive the grace, and mercy of God when we are in need of His help. He can change hearts. And sometimes, in His own cognizant, He will intercede without the encouragement of our prayers. Out of love and concern, He will make our wrongs right. In Ezekiel 36, God, so frustrated with the Israelites, decided He would punish them no more. Instead, because of their ungodly behavior, He would show them, He is God, and change their hearts. They would look back, and see how shameful they had become within their actions, and, or way of life. If God can change the heart of a nation (which I believe He is doing today with all the scandals of sexual immorality), He can change the hearts in relationships. The how is in His almighty power. He has a pocketful of miracles for our problems, and unwanted situations. In Jeremiah 33:3, God spoke to Jeremiah and said, “Call to me and I will answer you, and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” God sees, and knows all. So, we need not fear our circumstances, if we trust and truly believe in His mercy. Nor should we be afraid of His powers, all though it can seem eerie when He whispers secrets no one knows, or healings from impossible feats of reality. At times It scares even me… but I remember He is my father. He not only loves me, but will protect me, so I need not fear of His whispers, or what His course of action will be.  I simply abide in Him… Trust Him and wait on the holy spirit for guidance. I bear fruit. Like the fruit of the tree, it just appears. I abide in Him, and He gives me perfect peace as my mind is stayed on thee… not just on Sunday…but Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. He loves me. That’s it. Pure love.

                  If we trust Him too heal that which is unrelenting, we can trust He will keep us safe, and help us when we need help. Relationships and unwanted encounters, or situations are always difficult to endure. We need Him in our lives. It is impossible to stand the test without Him by our side.

                  CBW

                    A sin is a sin, is a sin….

                    A sin is a sin, is a sin….

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                    Sin can be engaged in a variety of ways. We can partake in sin, when living out of wedlock. Participate in sin in adultery affairs, or become murderers, liars, cheaters, sodomizers, and, or pedifiers, just to name a few. In Mark 7: 20-23, Jesus explains the things that come from the heart like sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, wickedness, cheating, shameless lust, envy, slander, arrogance, and foolishness, are all sin. Unlike spoiled food, originating from the outside, these sins originate in our heart, manifested by our own conscience. They are inside us, and so, not as easily to regurgitate as spoiled food. And though there is no justification for any of it, we should still show love and understanding for those who are engaged in such acts of sin. In Romans 14:10, it is explained not to be condescending. In 1 John 4: 7-11, John stresses the love of God, who loved us so much, He gave his only son as a sacrifice for our sins. And in return, all that He has asked of us is be imitators of God (Ephesians 5:1), i.e.., showing love for all, and sinning no more (John 8:11).

                    Jesus says in John 7:8, he that is without sin can cast the first stone, but as we all know no one is as fortunate to be without sin, except for Jesus. Living out of wedlock is my greatest sin. My family still loves me, but fact remains, I am living in sin. And according to my previous residency, not only was I committing a sin, but also a crime. Since 1868, it has been a crime in the state of Florida for opposite sex life partners to live together out of wedlock. Though it was intended to curtail interracial marriages at the time, it ultimately became an unspoken culture in the state of Florida. Not only was it relevant to interracial marriages, but to all couples regardless of race, who lived together out of wedlock. Yes, it was uncomfortable at times when I realized the reason for my displacement among others, but I did not retaliate, picket, or burn down establishments because of their displeasure towards me. What right, would I have had, to do so? I was sinning! The only true right I possessed were those to live and breathe. My God given rights. Any violation, towards these privileges, would be cause for taking a stand. But this was not the case. Only my moral disposition in life was impeded, and in this case, was warranted due to my actions outside of the law. Just as government has repercussions for violating the preservation of mankind, so does God for violating his commandments. But because He is not physically here to reprimand us, is no reason to take advantage of His kindness in giving His only son for our sins, that we abuse it and live our life the way we see fit. We should be accountable for all our actions (Romans 14:11) whether they be of sin, or not. Yes, it is written to let others deal with their actions themselves, i.e., letting their conscience be their guide, for if we truly believe in what we are doing, is for the love of God then it would be good. But, if in any way we feel conviction, then we should reevaluate our actions. Up until now, I truly believed that it was God’s love which bought us together, so I was committed, regardless of the sanctity of my commitment. But now in my journey, I want to be the daughter God intended me to be. I do not want to go around the mountain again, portrayed as the same person. As if there’s been no change in my walk with God… I want to give my all. In Proverbs 10:9 it says “He who walks with integrity walks securely, but he who perverts his ways will become known.

                    And so, my purpose is not to condemn anyone, or make them feel confused as to where they stand in the kingdom of God (Romans14:15). My purpose, always has, and always will be, to promote peace and love among us all, despite who we are as individuals. In order to do that we must accept each other and not think of our neighbors any less important as we think of ourselves. This goes for those who rob us in the night, of our life, and, or possessions. To those who rob men, women, and children of the right to have the opportunity to rationally consent to sexual encounters with decency and integrity. Or, even, to those who retaliate against, those who take advantage, and rob us of our liberties. Regardless of the degree of harm inflicted, God is no respecter of person. Whether it be towards the inflicted, or the inflictor; the sinner or the righteous. We should forgive all, and treat all with respect.  Leviticus 19:18 states, “You should not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord”.

                    We need a change. We need to all look inside ourselves, for but a mere reflection of our actions. Sin is so blatantly displayed these days. It is on the television, in our music, on our streets… It’s all about what sells, and saving face. Or how we can make money. But if we continue to secretly condone the acts of others, it will only become worse. Thank God for our forefathers who had the courage to take a stand and speak the truth. Thank God for those who are taking a stand today. But as we take this stand, let us remember to perform as God would perform. We are not to condemn people, lock the door and throw away the key. We all need help. We all need love. Not one of us needs to hear how ungodly, mean, or perverse we are living. This lesson is one I know too well, from both angles. It is only human to angrily retaliate, but we must remember to pray. And though this is difficult to do in the midst of the fire…, prayer changes a heart. Pray through the pain as you pray for the inflictor.  Again, it is not about us, but drawing those who have not had the chance to feel that love which comes from our Father above. It is about drawing them to the glorious kingdom of God, so they too can be made whole. We have a long road ahead… We should never be bored with life, for there is so much we have to accomplish in his kingdom.

                    Hebrews 4: 12-16

                    12God’s word is living and active. It is sharper than any two-edged sword and cuts as deep as the place where soul and spirit meet, the place where joints and marrow meet. God’s word judges a person’s thoughts and intentions. 13No creature can hide from God. Everything is uncovered and exposed for him to see. We must answer to him.

                    14We need to hold on to our declaration of faith: We have a superior chief priest who has gone through the heavens. That person is Jesus, the Son of God. 15We have a chief priest who is able to sympathize with our weaknesses. He was tempted in every way that we are, but he didn’t sin. 16So we can go confidently to the throne of God’s kindness to receive mercy and find kindness, which will help us at the right time. (When we become accountable for our actions……)

                    CWB

                       

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